Primal Carnage – Solid State (AtGames Legends Pinball Table Review)

PRIMAL CARNAGE – SOLID STATE

The solid state version of Primal Carnage shoots well enough, we suppose. What limited targets are here work. So, why were we so bored playing it? We were all sort of taken back by how subdued PCSS is. It’s not exactly a dynamic table. Honestly, we didn’t expect Magic Pixel would ever make anything this rudimentary again. The Taito tables kind of felt like the last hurrah for that. Guess we were wrong. This has no modes. It has no multiball. It gives the appearance of two distinct forms of gameplay: humans or dinosaurs. You pick one or the other at the start of each ball. Dinosaurs have to kill 100 humans, while humans have to inflict 10,00 hit points on dinosaurs. In reality, both have the same targets and the same requirements.

Both outlanes can be defended via old school Zaccaria outlane flippers. On a more thrilling table, these would be welcome. Here, it’s just another feature for a table that feels like it didn’t come from a place of genuine inspiration. Here’s hoping the other two Primal Carnage pins do better.

The math for each option appears different, but each requires the same amount of shots on the same targets. The object is just to repetitively grind shots until a counter reaches zero, then do it again with the opposite characters. Completing a cycle earns you an extra ball, and if you can do it twice (and we were never able to) it scores 50,000 points. This type of pick ‘n flick gameplay can work, but not with shots this boring or haphazardly laid out. The locker is particularly annoying, as it’s too easy to drain a ball in the locker’s sinkhole without actually lighting it, which requires all three drop targets to fall. The table’s signature, three different swinging targets, are too risky without proper value to be worthwhile. Primal Carnage SS’ gameplay is fossilized.
Stand Alone Table ($6 for HD, $7 for 4K)
Type: Zaccaria Solid State Model
Vice Family High: Angela “ADV” 71,130 (Top 20)
Sasha the Kid: BAD (2 out of 5)
Cathy: BAD
Angela: BAD
Oscar: BAD
Scoring Average: 2.0 – BAD

The Addams Family on Nintendo Switch Review: Pinball FX AND The Ultra-Rare Pinball Arcade Version

We’re among the very few people that own the Nintendo Switch versions of the Pinball Arcade’s Bally/Williams tables that were listed for a matter of minutes on April 6, 2018 before being delisted. We can’t get confirmation if these even appeared on the New Release list on the Switch’s eShop. We’re pretty sure they didn’t. We’ve also never been able to confirm that anyone bought these. Hey, we didn’t either! Like most digital pinball fans, by the time we found out they’d been listed, they were already long gone. It wasn’t even two hours before they were taken down. So, how’d we get them? After our work on The Pinball Arcade Buyer’s Guide, someone who appreciated our effort sent us copies. From what we hear, more people signed the Declaration of Independence than own these. Weirdly, we don’t have a complete set of TPA tables on Switch. We’re missing Star Trek and AC/DC, both of which are also delisted (and Whoa Nellie & Big Buck Hunter never were released at all). Still, these Bally/Williams pins, released in the normal Pinball Arcade “season” sets, are among the rarest content ever officially released in the history of any Nintendo platform.

These tables are gone, and they are NEVER coming back. There is no way to acquire them. Please do not pester Farsight for them. I’ve independently verified that the review codes no longer exist. We are SO grateful to own these, and yes, we’ve backed them up on memory cards. These will NOT become lost media, I swear it to you. Now, in some cases, we think these might actually be unfinished prototypes which meshes with the whole “we never meant to release these” vibe of TPA on Switch. Cirqus Voltaire and Scared Stiff especially play poorly. BUT, most of the pins play fine, and yes, you can play them in table mode. So, what to do with them? Well, we’re going to pit Pinball FX and The Pinball Arcade head-to-head. Did fans miss out? Apples & Oranges? Only one way to know! We dueled on each table. Now, only the Vices can vote for who won because Elias and Dave can’t play the Pinball Arcade builds, and other versions of these TPA tables aren’t 100% identical to TPA on Switch so Dave’s previous TPA ratings can’t carry over. Since The Pinball Arcade builds are delisted, we’re only comparing to the FX builds, which might highlight where Zen went right, and where they still have room to improve. These are “special features” at the Pinball Chick, but they should also be considered the definitive reviews of each Pinball FX Williams table on Switch.

Thank you Sasha the Kid for your hard work on these. Watch out, people. She has a black belt in Taekwondo now.

THE ADDAMS FAMILY
PINBALL FX FOR NINTENDO SWITCH

Thoughts of a Designer with Dave Sanders: “Learning to ride a bicycle: practice, balance, and more than a little intimidation to begin with. Mishaps and accidents are all but guaranteed. But, once it’s drilled into you, you never really forget. That’s Addams. Actually that defines much of Pat Lawlor’s career. His classics have always taken time to gel with me, and Addams took especially longer than was typical to learn to love (my sense of balance is lousy and Addams has no training wheels). But respect the effort, one eventually does. Zen has captured that pinball journey, that essence of “oh, riiiiiight” absolutely spot-on here with only the FIXABLE electric chair exploit (see below) letting it down. But no, you are still not going to get me to gush later over Lawlor’s ‘masterwork’ which followed up this one, the widebody I certainly admire but can admit to not personally liking that much. That one lies perpetually just beyond the border of the Comfort Zone, and even Rod Serling can only work so many miracles.”

You didn’t really believe us when we said we’d never write another Addams review, did you? As of this writing, Zen still hasn’t fixed the problem with the Electric Chair on Nintendo Switch. It allows players to cheese the doors by taking a dead flip from the chair and allowing the ball to hop from the left flipper to the right, at which point, 19 out of 20 times it’ll roll-up the switch and light the electric chair. It’s an easy conversion shot to take, too. Maybe the only easy shot on the whole table. Now, if you use this trick and don’t move off it, you’re not going to score a ton of points and, eventually, Seance will wreck your rhythm anyway. But, this trick can get you to the wizard in record time (Angela has done it in under two minutes). While this dead flip roll can happen on a real life Addams pin, it’s very rare, which is the only reason why Addams’ average rating fell over half-a-point on Switch. Patch this out and Addams has at least four MASTERPIECE votes coming and a shot at the Pantheon otherwise. Addams on Switch is still a Certified Excellent table that shoots fantastically on Nintendo’s platform, but it needs that last bit of fine tuning. Oh, and when they do it, they need to reset the leaderboards, even if this will cost Oscar his Arcade Mode world record. Which would be especially hilarious because he didn’t use the exploit. Put a smile on our faces, Zen. Well, five out of the six of us.😈
Stand Alone Release ($9.99)
Type: Solid State – Dot-Matrix Display
Based on The Addams Family by Bally (1992)
Designer: Pat Lawlor
Conversion: Zoltan “Pazo” Pataki
Duel Winner: Angela
Cathy: GREAT (4 out of 5)
Sasha the Kid: GREAT
Angela: GREAT
Oscar: GOOD (3 out of 5)
Dave: GREAT
Elias: GOOD
Scoring Average 3.66 – Awarded a CERTIFICATE OF EXCELLENCE
FX Difference: 0.54 Less
TPA Difference: 0.25 Less

THE PINBALL ARCADE ON NINTENDO SWITCH
THE ADDAMS FAMILY COMPARISON

Pinball FX

The Pinball Arcade

The Pinball Arcade version of Addams Family on Switch does indeed include the option for the Gold version (Special Collector’s Edition) of the table and its extra modes. We opted to play the gold version on TPA. Playing on two different engines back-to-back is a trip, and in the case of Addams, I wish everyone could feel the difference. Sometimes it’s like playing pinball on the moon, but Angela insists the actual shooting angles off the flippers are accurate enough that her muscle memory from real tables mostly works. Then she proved it by lighting us up. Her first ball on Addams TPA for Switch was better than any of our best Addams games on Switch, in any mode, even if you subtract the points from the extra modes. “The swamp cross-shot (Thing Flips without the automation) is clockable on TPA, as it is in real life. Sometimes it feels like Zen believes if players get good at making shots, there must be something wrong with their build, so they ‘fix it’ by adding artificial unpredictability to every shot to correct a problem that doesn’t exist. People get good at pinball. That’s how it’s supposed to work. TPA has just as many house balls as Zen, or a real Addams table. That’s Addams Family! But on TPA, if my read of the approaching ball is right and my timing is right, I’m certain the ball will go into the swamp locker. I can’t say that about the Pinball FX version. I can hit the ball approaching at the same speed off the same spot on the flipper, and sometimes it goes in and sometimes doesn’t. That’s just not as fun.”

She’s not wrong. We think it’s more the spin and inertia of the ball, which has never been even slightly life-like since Pinball FX 4 launched, that makes it harder to clock. Zen is great at making tables that look real life, but the ball is not a normal pinball. Wonky as the gravity in TPA is, the ball behaves predictably, and that matters on a rebounding-centric table like Addams. However, let it be said that Zen’s version of the magnets absolutely ANNIHILATES the awful TPA version, which is why FX won Sasha’s vote.
DELISTED
Type: Solid State – Dot-Matrix Display
Based on The Addams Family Special Collector’s Edition by Bally (1994)
Designer: Pat Lawlor
Vice Family High: Angela “ADV” 978,008,970
Cathy: GREAT
Sasha The Kid: GREAT
Angela: MASTERPIECE (5 out of 5)
Oscar: GOOD
Scoring Average: 4.0 – Awarded a CERTIFICATE OF EXCELLENCE

THE VOTES

Cathy: The Pinball Arcade*
Sasha the Kid: Pinball FX
Angela: The Pinball Arcade
Oscar: The Pinball Arcade*
Split Decision: The Pinball Arcade wins 3 – 1
*Oscar and Cathy are both switching votes if the chair exploit is fixed.

Beast Master (AtGames Legends Pinball Table Review)

BEAST MASTER

Beast Master is one of the “bonus” tables of Zaccaria Pinball. For AtGames Legends Pinball, they tossed those pins into the Zaccaria packs as +1 throw-in bonuses for the actual tables people would want (though let it be said that Speed Kings in Zaccaria Pack 8 is likely to enter the Pinball Chick Pantheon of Digital Pinball). Overall, Zaccaria Pack 1 is as good a collection of tables as it gets. Aerobatics is Certified Excellent. Black Belt, Black Belt Remake, and Circus likely will also be issued certificates. That’s a $60 value by our standards. Needless to say, we consider this to be a must-own pack for Legends owners and recommend that you buy it. And if you hear a strange banging noise when you do, pay no heed to it. It’s just Ed Krynski spinning in his grave because the pack comes with Beast Master. In our house, we revere Big Pin Kryn, and this bastardization of his famous 1979 widebody Genie feels like a crime against pinball. Now, it is an interesting thought experiment come to life. “What if you shrank a widebody? What do you get?” And Genie is just about as famous as that subgenre gets. Seems like a good place to start. But, there’s two HUGE problems with this smaller take on Kryn’s Djinn. First: they shrank the flippers, too. So this doesn’t feel like solid state. It feels like a boardwalk style clanker. See, shrinking a flipper doesn’t equally shrink your ability to aim, because aiming isn’t simply a function of where the ball is when you flip. Oh, that matters too, but you also have to consider that smaller flippers mean less surface to run off speed and fewer angles for rebounding. Rebounding is function of shooting. So, shrink a normal flipper by half and you’re reducing the potential to aim by significantly more than half. Like, as much as an eighty percent reduction. Needless to say, you can’t shrink flippers just because you also shrank a widebody into a standard. Thus a layout that should be a sharp shooter is eroded into, at its best, a slap shooter where you’re focused on keeping the ball in play. And that’s being very generous, because I don’t even think fans of slap shooters (as many of Krynski’s pins are) will like this. That’s why the leaderboard scores are so low. Even pros can’t work with these nubby little things. Not that it matters, because the dynamic scoring of Genie is gone completely, replaced by fewer targets that have lock-down scoring and no end-of-ball bonuses. You either hit an entire section of targets, every last one, or you can only get one score from each target. Either of these two factors would be a deal breaker by itself. Together, they make Beast Master one of Magic Pixel’s lowest points. They’re capable of amazing things, but when they phone it in? Oof.
Set: Zaccaria Pinball Pack 1
Type: Zaccaria Solid State – Rebuild
Design DNA: Genie by Gottlieb (1979)
Vice Family High: Sasha the Kid “KID” 44,900 (Top 20 All Time)
Cathy: THE PITS (1 out of 5)
Sasha the Kid: THE PITS
Angela: THE PITS
Oscar: THE PITS
Jordi: THE PITS*
Dave: THE PITS*
Scoring Average: 1.0 – CERTIFIED TURD
*Played on Zaccaria Pinball for Consoles/PC

Arkanoid (AtGames Legends Pinball Table Review)

ARKANOID

Getting the big question out of the way: does it feel like an Arkanoid pinball table? The answer, sadly, is not at all. Though not for a lack of effort. The 4 x 5 cluster of twenty drop targets just doesn’t have a brick-breaker quality to it. It COULD have, but the unfathomable decision was made to reset the cluster every lost ball. In fact, everything is reset between balls. You’ll note the video game itself doesn’t even do this. You don’t have to start every level of Arkanoid from the beginning if you die, and that makes us wonder how much Magic Pixel even played the source material before turning Black Pyramid of all tables into Arkanoid. By the way, Pyramid’s central target was one of the most famous swinging targets in pinball. Replacing that with drop targets would be like replacing the SuperCharger in Getaway with.. well, drop targets. Another problem is that the “bricks” are undervalued and de-incentivized. Why would anyone shoot these high risk targets that hang right over the drain for 1,000 points each when the low-risk spinners on the side score the same or higher AND also give you a shot at landing the ball in the saucer, which could light the massive 10x bonus multiplier? Yes, the value of those bricks goes up but only if you pop all twenty, without draining. It’s just too many drop targets for such a fast-running, bouncy, high difficulty table. Maybe if your progress carried-over between balls, it might be a viable strategy, but we’ll never know, apparently. Otherwise, Arkanoid’s layout is pretty good, even if the outlanes are on an all-steel diet. Arkanoid is NOT a beginners’ table, but fans of defense-heavy tables that still manage to maintain a faster pace (like Oscar and Sasha the Kid) should really enjoy this table’s flow. In fact, the layout is so good we initially had it pegged as a shoe-in for a Certificate of Excellence. But the illogical scoring, and not the high difficulty, undermine its potential. You know, Magic Pixel, it’s nothing a patch couldn’t fix. AtGames and Magic Pixel could even do an entire marketing campaign based around updating all their older pins with new, enlightened rules. Arkanoid is pretty good, but that’s really frustrating because it should be a classic, and it’s not.
Set: Taito Pinball Pack 3
Type: Zaccaria Solid State – Rebuild
Design DNA: Black Pyramid by Bally (1984)
Vice Family High: Cathy “IGC” 411,900
Cathy: GOOD (3 out of 5)
Angela: GOOD
Oscar: GREAT (4 out of 5)
Sasha the Kid: GREAT
Scoring Average: 3.5 – Awarded a CLEAN SCORECARD

AtGames Legends Pinball: Natural History Pinball Pack 1, 2, and 3 Table Reviews

Huge thanks to Sasha the Kid, all of 9 years old, who actually wrote a lot of this. She is heir-apparent to Indie Gamer Chick and The Pinball Chick and a very talented pinballer who set her first world record at the ripe age of 8 (she was briefly Exploding Kittens world champion for Pinball FX and since then has claimed a few other records that held on longer). Sasha got the AtLegends Micro for Christmas in 2023 and she’s been putting more time into it than we have our other AtGames pins. She’s worked very hard with all of us to put this together. Like all Pinball Chick reviews, this is the product of my whole pinball-playing family debating the merits of these pins. With that said, each Natural History pack costs $25 and comes with four tables. Presented to you here are quick reviews of all twelve tables in that series so far, along with general thoughts on the Natural History franchise. Enjoy!
WE DO NOT OWN THE 4K MODELS YET, but these reviews should cover those builds as well.

Scoring System

MASTERPIECE: 5 out of 5, the cream of the crop.
GREAT: 4 out of 5, an elite pin.
GOOD: 3 out of 5. A decent but flawed pin. To be clear, GOOD means “good” at The Pinball Chick.
BAD: 2 out of 5, a poorly designed pin or a competent pin that’s just not fun.
THE PITS: 1 out of 5, an actively abysmal pin with a multitude of problematic elements.

Award System

CERTIFIED EXCELLENT: A scoring average of 3.6 or higher awards a Certificate of Excellence. We generally consider a table that’s awarded this certificate to have a value of $15 by itself.
PANTHEON INDUCTEE: A scoring average of 4.6 or higher earns the table a space in our Pantheon of Digital Pinball. We generally consider a table that enters the Pantheon to be a must-own table.
CLEAN SCORECARD: An otherwise decent table that, while not amazing, earned no ratings of BAD or THE PITS. We don’t place a set value on this award and suggest our readers decide what a table we ultimately all approve of is worth to you.
💩CERTIFIED TURD💩: A scoring average of 1.4 or lower earns the table a place in the Sewer of Digital Pinball. While we don’t penalize a set for having a Certified Turd, it certainly isn’t a positive thing.

NATURAL HISTORY GENERAL REVIEW

Natural History, generic as it is, is also one of the most consistently good franchises in digital pinball. Most of these are basically Zaccaria Pinball Deluxe models by Magic Pixel. A couple are more like their Zaccaria Remake line due to really simple layouts, but all twelve use LCD scoreboards and overall, these are pretty ambitious pins.
The LCD scoreboards are awful. The animations are too slow and too frequent. Some tables might see players go quite a while before they can even see what their score is because animations are constantly going off. We’re not fans of Magic Pixel/Zaccaria’s LCD scoreboards in general. They’re cheap looking, ugly, and pretty slow. We think a lot of the bugs were related to scoreboards, possibly because of the gameplay happening faster than the scoreboard can keep up with. Magic Pixel should consider new ROMs for every pin. It’s not too late.
Out of the twelve tables, a whopping nine earned positive marks across the board. In total, there were four tables CERTIFIED EXCELLENT and five that won a CLEAN SCORECARD.
Every Natural History pack has at least one table that won a Certificate of Excellence.
No MASTERPIECE votes were cast at all. Dinosaur Dynasty 1 would have gone four-for-four if not for the ROM not reading every lit shot.
The best overall pack is a little bit murky. Technically, Natural History 3 is the only one that made up its $25 price tag via certificates, as it has two Certified Excellent tables. But, it also has the only 💩Certified Turd💩 in the franchise. Natural History 1, on the other hand, had no votes of BAD or THE PITS cast at all.
Four different tables were named “best overall Natural History table” by the four Vice Family players. Cathy named Dinosaur Dynasty 2 her #1. Sasha was the only GREAT vote at all for Amazonia and declared it her #1. Insect World was Angela’s favorite, while Oscar preferred Egypt. We’re all in agreement that if Dinosaur Dynasty 1 is fixed, it’ll be our unanimous #1.
Some of the tables crash, which means it just takes you back to the table’s page on the launcher. One time, a table froze so badly we had to restart the whole machine. Nobody suffered worse than Angela. She had multiple high-scoring games that would have easily been the family high scores, one of which was even a world record pace. We couldn’t figure out any reason for this.

AFRICA

Like most of the Zaccaria Deluxe models, Africa is a zoner. If you don’t like that style of pin, you’re not going to like this one. I think all the Vices are fans of Zaccaria Deluxe pins, but they all have the same basic problems. Zaccaria DMs always shoot a little clunky, but I like that. I like that they use non-traditional angles that have to be learned for the first time instead of basing the angles off of famous earlier pins. Africa’s targets are built especially off the supplementary flippers. This is a shooter’s pin, with an emphasis on tight shots off the sup’s. Like most Zaccaria DMs, they never quite learned full scoring balance. The upper right hand corner has three targets that light a spinner that can practically open a scoring floodgate. When it works, at least. Sometimes the ball goes right on target and the spinner doesn’t budge. They need to patch this for Oscar and Cathy to bump their scores to GREAT. I think the overall thrilling targets make up for it. Africa is one of the best Natural History pins.
Pack: Natural History Pack 2
Vice Family High: Cathy “IGC” 274,732,360 (#26 All Time)
Cathy: GOOD – Sasha the Kid: GREAT – Angela: GREAT – Oscar: GOOD
Scoring Average: 3.5 – Awarded a CLEAN SCORECARD

AMAZONIA

They could have just as well based this table on the Panama Canal for how wide the flipper drain is. There’s a drain pin that can be highly effective with practice, but it’s never quite predictable when the ball will lose its bounce on it. It doesn’t help that the table mechanics themselves are unpredictable. The South American Jaguar hole kicks the ball out multiple different strengths and angles, sometimes right between the flippers. So, when playing Amazon, prepare to play defensively. On the other hand, like most of Magic Pixel’s Deluxe line, Amazonia goes BIG with a mixture of classic pinball and a virtual wonderland of ramps, secondary and, uh, third..an..ary flippers. How come “thirdanary” isn’t a word? Modes are short and pay off huge. Completing rows of stand-up targets pays off huge. Like with Africa, there’s a heavily unbalanced and relatively low-risk mini-field that puts a damper on everything because the logical strategy is to go for it and grind-up easy points. None of us hated Amazonia, but none of us loved it either. Except Sasha, but she beat the crap out of us on it.
Pack: Natural History Pack 1
Vice Family High: Cathy “IGC” 117,029,540
Cathy: GOOD – Sasha the Kid: GREAT – Angela: GOOD – Oscar: GOOD
Scoring Average: 3.25 – Awarded a CLEAN SCORECARD

DEEP OCEAN

One of the few bad tables in the Natural History series, Deep Ocean should instead be renamed “Deep Drain” from all the angles the drain swallows-up live balls. Most of the return angles are shallow and aimed at the drain. You’d swear this is a Zen original with how trollish those angles are. A sharpshooter can get away with a table based around rapid-fire transitions from offense to defense, but not a big, complicated monstrosity like Deep Ocean. Also, those left rails are among the consistently deadly of any rails we’ve experienced. This is a table that crosses the line into demoralizing, but it lacks the fun shots that make up for it. The best thing we can say about Deep Ocean is that it speaks to how strong the Zaccaria Deluxe line’s premise is, because it’s not even close to THE PITS for any of us. Instead, it’s just frustrating to the point of boredom.
KICKBACK – Oscar: How did I raise such soft kids? Deep Ocean’s problems are entirely related to how easy it is to work the bumpers for high-yield, low risk points. The return angles are dangerous, but you can defend against them. What was the point of buying an expensive table with relatively accurate nudge detection if you kids aren’t going to use it to defend the drain? Magic Pixel has got to start learning some semblance of scoring balance, but the challenge Deep Ocean presents is hardly insurmountable.
Pack: Natural History Pack 2
Vice Family High: Angela “ADV” 76,847,980
Cathy: BAD – Sasha the Kid: BAD – Angela: BAD – Oscar: GOOD
Scoring Average: 2.25 – BAD

DINOSAUR DYNASTY

Dinosaur Dynasty is the definition of a pinball killer app and potentially one of the greatest Magic Pixel pins ever. But, it’s not, because it’s one of the most problematic pins. Angela especially has a legitimate beef with it, as it became the first table to crash our AtGames pin, and it was after she had a 90,000,000+ ball (a top 50 pace). It also had an uncanny tendency to not recognize made shots during modes. Since all scoring halts during modes, it’s a dinosaur-sized problem to have even one shot be made, complete the circuit, and not count, for whatever reason, towards progress. This happens a lot with Zaccaria’s Deluxe line, but Dinosaur Dynasty 1 is the absolute worst with it. Now, here’s the good news: all four Vices are ready to roll out the red carpet for Dinosaur Dynasty to enter the Pinball Chick Pantheon of Digital Pinball. This DESERVES to be an elite pin, with a killer layout and a wide variety of satisfying shots and targets. The mini-tables never feel like a grind. The layout feels fully optimized for multiball. Look, we all hate the Magic Pixel “no scoring during modes” setup. It’s lame and I hope they mature past it eventually. But, Dinosaur Dynasty is easily one their best tables ever and worthy of a perfect score, and it’s only not getting one due to terrible coding. Magic Pixel, you have GOT to fix this. Dinosaur Dynasty should be your flagship pin. The ROM seems to be pretty slow in general, it takes FOREVER to count up points, but if you fix it and it recognizes every made shot, we will induct this in the Pantheon.
Pack: Natural History Pack 1
Vice Family High: Angela “ADV” 119,203,200
Cathy: GREAT – Sasha the Kid: GREAT – Angela: GOOD – Oscar: GREAT
Scoring Average: 3.75 – Awarded a CERTIFICATE OF EXCELLENCE

DINOSAUR DYNASTY 2

Yep, this is a franchise now. Actually, thanks to the ROM issues with the first table, right now the sequel has a high scoring average. 0.25 points higher, but higher is higher. We greatly admire that this follow-up to Dinosaur Dynasty plays NOTHING like the first. You feel it in the modes, which have a wider variety of targets and no timer running against you. Well, not exactly running against you. You can’t time out, but every mode is potentially high-yielding if you can get your shots off fast enough because they have hurry-ups attached to them. Good thing, too, because DD2 is one of the easiest Magic Pixel pins. This is a positive, though. Dynasty 2 can be an excellent trainer table for the more complex pins in the Deluxe line. On the downside, this is a pretty boring multiball table, which is a shame because it’s an easy multiball to activate. Dinosaur Dynasty isn’t the most exciting table, but it also makes very few mistakes.
Pack: Natural History Pack 3
Vice Family High: Angela “ADV” 289,935,470 (#10 All Time)
Cathy: GREAT – Sasha the Kid: GREAT – Angela: GREAT – Oscar: GREAT
Scoring Average: 4.0 – Awarded a CERTIFICATE OF EXCELLENCE

EGYPT

Egypt is so full of burst-scoring mini-modes that it’s almost a surprise this is a Magic Pixel table. The mini-modes are based around different Egyptian Gods, and each mode is quick to activate and scales based on how many times you activate each mode in a single ball. You can get up to five million per shot with these, if you grind-up the value. Other than the transfer shots required to make your way to the basement, they might be too easy. The transfer from the basement to the primary playfield is done via the plunger in a way that directly feeds the primary flippers. Because of that, the basement isn’t merely low-risk, but no-risk. Unless the game crashes. Angela, yet again, was the victim of a crash, during the basement when she built up a massive value of the easy-to-shoot HORUS mode. At least it was only once this time and there were no instances of the table just not recognizing made shots. The main modes feel like extended versions of the mini-modes, only there’s no timer and optional bonus points to be had by completing an extra task while the mode is live. Ancient Egypt is a digital pinball staple and, while this offers nothing new, the layout is pretty fun, even if the thrills are low thanks to the basement and the main table being so disconnected from each-other.
Pack: Natural History Pack 2
Vice Family High: Oscar “OEV” 430,481,570 (#7 All Time)
Cathy: GREAT – Sasha the Kid: GREAT – Angela: GREAT – Oscar: GREAT
Scoring Average: 4.0 – Awarded a CERTIFICATE OF EXCELLENCE

EXOPLANETS

If Exoplanets were revamped to be more inline with the current crop of new Zaccaria/Magic Pixel Deluxe pins, it’d be one of our top-ranked tables. Magic Pixel’s fatal flaw has long been the fact that all other scoring pauses during modes, but that really hurts Exoplanets. There’s so many fun targets that go unloved during modes. Of course, Exoplanet has the shortest modes of any Zaccaria Deluxe Model. Like, seriously, the first mode is done in a single shot. Not one shot done three times. ONE SHOT! Exoplanet is a great trainer table for pinball newcomers. It also carries over the concept of portholes that act as the multiball locks and suck the balls in, ala the Zen Studios classic Ahch-To Island. Only these seem to create a gravity sink whether they’re “lit” or not. It’s also worth noting that this was the AtGames exclusive we’ve reviewed so far that didn’t merely crash but froze the entire device and forced us to recycle the power. So, beware this one. The good news is that Exoplanets is likable. Almost like the logical spiritual successor to PIN*BOT. We really hope Magic Pixel realizes that there’s nothing inherently sacred about their original builds for all these pins and revamps them all with new rules that open the game up during modes. We think Exoplanets would be a shoe-in for a Certificate of Excellence. Right now, it’s only okay.
Pack: Natural History Pack 1
Vice Family High: Sasha the Kid “KID” 173,538,420
Cathy: GOOD – Sasha the Kid: GOOD – Angela: GOOD – Oscar: GOOD
Scoring Average: 3.0 – Awarded a CLEAN SCORECARD

THE INSECT WORLD

Wait, didn’t Magic Pixel already do a butterfly-themed table? Farfalla Deluxe, right? No? Okay, well, this is a solid table too. It’s one of the easiest tables to juggle a combo with any of us have ever played, but Insect World flows so smoothly that the endless passing between four orbits, two of which are ramps, never gets old. In fact, we were putting up monster scores without even starting modes. It wasn’t until Angela went crazy and shot the lights out after crashing a nine-figure first ball (seriously, don’t make her mad. It just makes her shoot better) that we even found out how to start a mode at all. The mode start is a six-shot locker that’s tucked away from other targets. It’s an odd choice, to the point that it felt like they almost forgot to make a mode start target and just shoved it wherever they could find room. Insect World is such a well-flowing table that we’ll grant them that one instance of inelegance. We liked that each set of lane lights are independent to each flipper, something we’d like to see a lot more of in the future. Angela wants to stress that they need to patch this, because she crashed it a couple times and was ready to quit AtGames reviews altogether. It started to feel spooky that it was only happening to her. It speaks to how good this table can be that Angela wanted to finish what she started. In a solid pinball franchise, Insect World is a standout. Get rid of the butterflies swooping over the playfield, though.
Pack: Natural History Pack 3
Vice Family High: Angela “ADV” 494,643,600 (#8 All-Time)
Cathy: GREAT – Sasha the Kid: GREAT – Angela: GREAT – Oscar: GREAT
Scoring Average: 4.0 – Awarded a CERTIFICATE OF EXCELLENCE

THE LAST ICE AGE

Last Ice Age is a potentially great table that’s about one-third worse off just based on the violence of the bumpers and slingshots alone. We’ve had entire 60 second timers eaten up by balls bouncing around the bumpers. Mind you, you’re scoring NOTHING that entire time, too. This is one of those pins where the rest of the targets take a nap during a mode. The bumpers are too close too close to each-other, and for a few of the modes, they’re basically unavoidable because the lit shots feed them. The slingshots are equally as violent, so 60 seconds to finish a mode is NEVER sixty seconds of actual chances at winning the mode, especially since so many angles drop the balls straight on those ultra-violent slings. Ice Age is hypothetically a close cousin of Egypt, with lots of mini-modes that would be fun if not for the fact that the slings and bumpers prevent you from even being able to shoot the ball in the first place. This is also one of those tables where you shoot saucers instead of targets or cellars, and even if the shot is on point, it’s a coin flip if the ball will actually score the saucer or just roll out. Ice Age is a GREAT table rendered barely okay. There’s nothing it does wrong that Magic Pixel couldn’t adjust. They should, because the modes are good enough that this should cruise to Certificate of Excellence.
Pack: Natural History Pack 1
Vice Family High: Oscar “OEV” 250,082,060
Cathy: GOOD – Sasha the Kid: GOOD – Angela: GOOD – Oscar: GOOD
Scoring Average: 3.0 – Awarded a CLEAN SCORECARD

NATURE’S FURY

Nature’s Fury was going to be the worst of the Natural History pins even if it didn’t make some of the most mind-bogglingly dumb design choices of any AtGames exclusive table. This is a house ball machine, with several auto-plunges ricocheting off fixtures and down the drain in a way you can’t possibly defend against. Seriously, this plunger needs to be taken out back and shot like Old Yeller, then replaced with a new plunger that actually sends the ball up and into the playfield. It doesn’t matter though, because randomly killing balls is this table’s thing. We only managed to play the first two modes, the first of which is lightning strikes. You have to hit the flashing ramps five times, and while you do this, the table shoots your ball with lightning, stopping the shots dead in their tracks. We’re not kidding. Anyone want to play a pinball table where literal sky magic stops your ball from completing a shot that’s on point? More than once, the ball was literally on the ramp when the lightning hit it and sent it backwards. The final straw was that getting into a shooting rhythm isn’t possible because if you make the ramp shot too close together, the game likely won’t count it. This is one of those tables where the ROM is so slow that you have to wait for it to finish processing the previous made shot before you can make it again. So even making the ramp five times doesn’t guarantee you win because it just plain might not count some of the shots. Hey, Magic Pixel: your scoreboards don’t need as much animation as you do with them, because those animations are breaking the games! They’re scoreboards, not Hollywood productions! Stop it! This table themed around disasters lives up to the theme in the worst way possible.
Pack: Natural History 3
Vice Family High: Angela “ADV” 364,172,320
Cathy: THE PITS – Sasha the Kid: THE PITS – Angela: THE PITS – Oscar: THE PITS
Scoring Average: 1.0 – 💩CERTIFIED A TURD💩

POLAR EXPEDITION

We assume they gave this a polar theme because the pace is glacial. Did this table REALLY need seven jet bumpers at the top? Seven! It slows the gameplay to a crawl, especially since so many angles lead to the eight lanes that feed the bumpers. Yikes. Well, at least they didn’t do anything truly moronic, like tying a high-scoring two-ball multiball to the bumpers. Oh wait, they did. Yea, it doesn’t take that many bumps to activate Antarctic Multiball, where you can juice the jackpot values by shooting the SEAL saucer. Okay, well, tell me that they didn’t further compound this problematic design by, say, tying the ball save to the slingshots, which are basically unavoidable. Oh wait, they did that too. Both Angela and Sasha had 200,000,000 point multiballs from this easy to get multiball alone. So, why aren’t they the world champions? Because they couldn’t avoid starting the low-scoring modes, where all other targets stop putting up any points. Since basically every shot is tied to a different mode start, you could end up stuck grinding out the lit mode shots when multiball will earn you 50x their value. Any table where you DON’T want to start modes is guaranteed to fail. Ignore the 2.0 we gave it, because Polar Expedition’s entertainment value is sub-zero.
Pack: Natural History Pack 2
Vice Family High: Angela “ADV” 396,258,060 (#14 All Time)
Cathy: BAD – Sasha the Kid: BAD – Angela: BAD – Oscar: BAD
Scoring Average: 2.0 – BAD

WORLD OF MICROBES

Easily the most odd of the Natural History tables, World of Microbes has a fairly conventional layout that’s made “wacky.” The mini-field is mostly (but not entirely) accessible through a whiparound loop, which is shaped like a half-moon dimple on the left wall and basically acts as a transfer if shot correctly. It’s so satisfying to shoot, and the mini-field pays off high enough to make it worth shooting. The rest of the table is downright tame, but there’s one final twist: Magic Pixel’s best use ever of digital targets. The “modes” see players shooting at different viruses that roam around the table. While they make for good targets, they’re not as good as they could be. Because the whole Zaccaria Deluxe engine is apparently slow, the little viruses and bacteria sprites that you shoot don’t die on impact. There’s a pronounced delay from the time contact is made until they go into their death animation. Thus, there’s no OOMPH, and without that, it takes away all satisfaction these targets should, by all rights, be loaded with. In general, we’re not happy with the performance of the ROMs for any Natural History table, but World of Microbes is the first one where it actively sucks the excitement out of the gameplay. If they fix this, it’s another game that can cruise to a Certificate.
Pack: Natural History 3
Vice Family High: Angela “ADV” 208,916,960
Cathy: GREAT – Sasha the Kid: GOOD – Angela: GOOD – Oscar: GOOD
Scoring Average: 3.25 – Awarded a Clean Scorecard

Blade (Pinball FX Table Review)

Blade
First Released December 8, 2010
Main Platform: Pinball FX
Switch Platform: Pinball FX
Designed by Imre “Emeric” Szigeti
Set: Marvel Pinball Collection 1 ($23.99)
Links: Strategy Guide – Pinball FX Wiki

Oddly enough, only a handful of the Marvel pins actually attempt to feel like they’re tied to comic books. You’d think Blade would be one of those that didn’t, but it’s really second only to Spider-Man in creating that comic-like energy using fonts and key art. We really like how this looks.

Blade does two things really well. First, it’s a pretty good tribute to early-to-mid 90s William/Bally tables. A clean, simple layout that flows really nice. Second, as stated above, this is a no doubt about it COMIC BOOK pin in the same way that Ed Kryinski’s Incredible Hulk (1979 Gottlieb) and Amazing Spider-Man (1980 Gottlieb) were. Blade isn’t anywhere near as good as Zen’s take on Spidey, but it’s a damn good table. Modes zip right on by after a couple shots, instead of the typical Zen grind. A novel monetary system allows you to buy a variety of upgrades, like kickbacks and extended ball save for the cowardly, or high-yielding scoring opportunities. Oh, and this could have easily been Castlevania II: Simon’s Quest Pinball. The table shifts from day to night and back again, with modes and bonuses exclusive to each. This could have come across as gimmicky, but it actually does work thanks to balancing what is and isn’t available during each cycle.

**Signature Feature – Day/Night Cycles**: All the missions (main modes) must be done during night by shooting the Lawlor Trail between the flippers, which is a shockingly tough shot. Night also has some of the best hurry-ups in Pinball FX, where you have to shoot specific lanes to slay vampires for money. The shop where you spend that money is only open during the day, along with the path to the valuable items. Our main knock with the day/night concept is that the clock for it is on the left slingshot. It would have been really great to have a separate ticking clock somewhere. Make it optional if people are afraid about ruining the purity of the visuals.

Blade’s layout looks conservative, but actually, it’s one of the more elegant and deceptively complex shooters we’ve seen from Zen. And that’s just the layout! The rules are very ambitious, with RPG-like mechanics such as stamina, money, upgrades, and collecting items. You build your Stamina (and avoid shots that drain it) so that you get more time to complete the modes. If there’s a problem with Blade, it’s that it’s the rare Zen table that doesn’t quite have enough shots. What shots are here are perfectly fine, but it can wear thin in extended play. It’s also very conservative in scoring, but without any of the balance that type of scoresheet requires. It makes Blade a table where shooting combos is just as exciting as making jackpots, which might not necessarily be a good thing because it means excitement doesn’t build. It’s incidental, and that’s before I get to an absurdly overpowered scoring device so wildly imbalanced that it broke my father and has me cracking up. It’s a whole new level of badly balanced.

**Signature Element – Citadel**: This mini-table is where you collect the items. This is one of those kinds where you have to poke the ball off the correct rail. It’s the second one from the bottom that you want to light (which is done via the spinner), though it’s also that item which completely throws Blade’s scoring balance out of whack. You’ll see why..

During a day cycle, the path between the flippers will take you to the Citadel instead of the mode start. Trust me, you’ll want to go here first. There’s four total items. One adds 100 points to every score, which is basically worthless. One cuts the cost of items in half, while one cuts the amount of mode start targets you need to hit in half. Those two are good ideas. The fourth and final item, Azu’s Belt, doubles all scoring permanently. Wow. Yea, that’s insane and I have no way to spin that where it makes any sense. It badly hurts Blade’s flexibility, because the only logical strategy to start the game is work towards getting the belt as soon as possible. I don’t think it’s a deal breaker, but it does sting quite a bit. While I think this does a better job than most at ambitious RPG-like gameplay, I kinda wish they’d just stuck with the old school gameplay with new-school surroundings layout. It’s one of my favorite designs, but Blade throws a lot at you and the results are more mixed than a table that shoots this well should be.
Special Consideration – Nintendo Switch: On Switch, Blade has orbits aimed straight at the drain, which doesn’t happen in the Primary Pinball FX builds. They need to fix this, since you need to hit those shots sometimes. Until then, we consider the Switch version to be ⚠OUT OF ORDER⚠
Cathy: GREAT (4 out of 5)
Angela: GREAT
Oscar: GOOD (3 out of 5)
Jordi: GREAT
Sasha: GOOD
Primary Scoring Average: 3.6 📜CERTIFIED EXCELLENT📜
Some review copies were provided in this review, others were paid for.

Black Rose (Pinball FX Table Review)

Black Rose
First Released July, 1992
Zen Build Released December 4, 2018
Main Platform: Pinball FX
Switch Platform: Pinball FX 3
Designed by John Trudeau and Brian Eddy
Conversion by Peter Horvath
Set: Williams Pinball Collection 1 ($23.99)
Links: Internet Pinball Database Listing – Strategy Guide – Pinball FX Wiki

Black Rose is the owner of what is, for my money, the second strangest layout among Williams pins in Pinball FX’s lineup. Space Station’s lack of an Italian Bottom sets it apart as #1, but the race for weirdness is a lot closer than you’d think. At least the rest of Space Station feels like traditional 80s style shot selection, ramps, and objectives. Black Rose is just flat-out bonkers with its sharp-angled ramps and tight squeezes, all packed into a very claustrophobic playfield. If I had never played Black Rose before Pinball FX, I’d have sworn this was a Zen original. It feels more like their modern design than any of the 90s pins in their library.

It was the Pinball Chick staff that was given the task of introducing Black Rose to the lineup to the new Pinball FX. We had a pretty decent pool to choose from, but Black Rose stood out. We enjoyed the task of hyping a table we weren’t necessarily in love with, but found admiration in nonetheless. Hell, Angela had it ranked BAD for Pinball FX3 and Pinball Arcade. At the time, she was still essentially a rookie to pinball. She fully admits now that, with a few years of pinball experience, she’d be more inclined to enjoy Black Rose, but she thinks the outlanes are too punishing for their own good. However, the new Pinball FX build is a little more manageable in that regard, leading to her revising her score. “It’s alright” was her new, unenthused opinion that she insisted not a single word be added to. That’s fair. Let’s face it, Black Rose is a very problematic pin. Horrible scoring balance (the Double Broadside mode is absurd). Little incentive to tour the table. Brutal multiballs that can end in the blink of an eye thanks to the lack of ball save. This isn’t a table for the faint of heart.

**Signature Element – The Cannon**: Do you know what I love most about the cannon? It’s the rare gimmicky element of the 1990s that doesn’t cause any interference during normal gameplay. You don’t have to shoot around it. You don’t have to factor it in at all when trying to make your shots. It’s wonderful.

On the other hand, I’m finally prepared to raise the GOOD score I awarded it to GREAT, because Black Rose looks and plays great on Pinball FX. The cannon is one of the great key shots of the early 90s, while the whirlpool ramp has grown on me over the years. I didn’t love it before. Now, I’ve come to appreciate how satisfying it is to fully charge its value. Also, in this new build, multiballs don’t feel like they clear each-other out to such an absurd degree as they did in Pinball FX3. Having now put more time into real life Black Rose tables, yea, that doesn’t really happen on a corporeal version. Multiball is much cleaner in real life, and while it’s not 100% there on Pinball FX, this build is more true to how a physical Black Rose shoots. Even with the improvements, Black Rose is still a bizarre and punishing table with unconventional angles and hungry outlanes. Oh and that Walk the Plank video mode can choke on a sea biscuit and die. As much fun as Black Rose is, it will always feel like a prototype for the type of Brian Eddy layout that would dominate the end of the arcade era of pinball. As far as proof of concepts go, it’s a good one, but it’s mostly just a taste of better pins that would happen thanks to it.
Cathy: GREAT (GOOD on Pinball FX3)
Angela: GOOD (BAD on Pinball FX3)
Oscar: GOOD
Jordi: GREAT
Dash: GREAT
Sasha: GREAT
Elias: GREAT (Pinball FX3)
Dave: GREAT (Pinball FX3)
Overall Scoring Average: 3.75 📜CERTIFIED EXCELLENT📜
Primary Scoring Average: 3.66 📜CERTIFIED EXCELLENT📜
Pinball FX3 Scoring Average: 3.16 – GOOD
Some review copies were provided in this review, others were paid for.

Introducing: Table Types

The Pinball Chick aspires to be the premier source of digital pinball reviews and study. That’s why every table is rated by five different players of different experience, skill, and preferences. But, we also know that many players fall in-love with specific types of tables. We do it too! That’s why we’ve created a classification system to help players track down the digital tables that best suit their tastes. After putting thousands of hours into digital pinball in 2020, we’ve determined that there are five primary types of tables.

Sharpshooter

Sharpshooters are tables based around a wide-variety of traditional targets and narrow orbits. The primary table type from the 1970s through 1991, sharpshooters challenge players to slow the action down and take careful aim at specific targets, often with incentives to connect in a sequential order. Accuracy and the ability to shoot in rapid-succession are rewarded, while misfires come with a high risk. Sharpshooters typically have strict rules that test elite players with little flexibility for individual strategy.
Examples: Firepower, Space Shuttle, Gorgar, El Dorado.

Finesse

The primary game type from 1992 through the modern age of pinball, finesse tables are typically driven by modes, multiballs, combos, and jackpots. While building your score requires a linear progression of modes, players have more flexibility to create their own strategies. Finesse tables are all about transitioning from orbital combos to target shooting and reward ball-handling skills. The majority of DMD tables fall into this category.
Examples: Medieval Madness, Funhouse, Theatre of Magic, Star Trek: The Next Generation, Twilight Zone.

Kinetic

Kinetic tables are defined by lightning-fast gameplay and bounciness. Kinetics often employ chaos elements (bumpers and slingshots) near primary targets to keep the ball in constant flux, making them the tables that require the most playtime to master. Gaining control of the ball will pose the greatest challenge. Anticipation will be a player’s greatest asset. Kinetic tables often incentivize high-risk bank shots or flat shots that return at high-risk angles, and are excellent to teach players angles and quick judgment.
Examples: Attack From Mars, White Water, Creature from the Black Lagoon

Pick ‘n Flick

Arguably the best table type to introduce newcomers to pinball, pick ‘n flick tables are slower, more deliberate games based simple shots. Players are at their leisure to pick a singular target, steady themselves, and flick the ball. Pick ‘N Flicks often allow for repetitive shooting of high-scoring targets or combos. Novelty tables based around eye-catching gimmicks often employ a pick ‘n flick design sense. Professional players often avoid, if not outright hate, the pick ‘n flick setup. But, rookies can use them to build muscle memory, as these tables often rely on common angles and simple mode advancement. When combined with some of the more fun concepts in the medium, pick ‘n flick layouts become the ideal training ground to hone basic pinball skills.
Examples: Hurricane, Junk Yard, The Party Zone

Boardwalk

Boardwalk-style tables are the dinosaurs of pinball. For the majority of the sport’s existence, this style of design dominated the industry. In the days when pinball was thought to be completely random, boardwalk-style tables lived down to that reputation. Relying heavily on so many bumpers that high scores will come down to just plain dumb luck, it’s no wonder that the medium was banned in places New York City. In the golden age of electro-mechanical tables, pinball was associated primarily with the mafia and illegal gambling. It’s why we almost considered calling this style Speakeasy. But, the reputation was never fully justified, and it would be a disservice to say boardwalks have no value today. The best of this breed often rely on skillful use of a plunger and nudging more than flippers. In fact, they’re excellent at training for bank shots, subtle tilting, and simple target shooting. Plus, the iconic chimes and bells of the era will inevitably bewitch you with all the charm of a simpler time.
Examples: Central Park, Spanish Eyes.

The Exception: Hybrids

Sometimes, you can’t quite pigeonhole a table into a specific category. If so, The Pinball Chick will list the primary type hyphenated with the secondary type. For example, Monster Bash is a finesse-kinetic. The Getaway: High Speed II is a sharpshooter-kinetic. Because of the nature of design, a pick ‘n flick will never be a hybrid, and a kinetic will almost never be a primary-type in a hybrid.